Blød Indeni

 Hey everybody,

When Marcellus said "Something is rotten in the state of Denmark" I believe he was referring to Woods, who had not done laundry in 8 days by the time I met him in Copenhagen.  You see, Woods had spent 4 weeks cycling around Denmark and was in desperate need of a washing machine.  Lucky for him, the Airbnb where we stayed in Nyhavn was supplied with a washer/dryer, although the residents had left a wet load of laundry in said washer.  

Mustang or Pinto?  You decide.

Why Denmark?  That's where Woods was. I invited myself. I suppose I owe you more of an explanation since, you know, you're reading this.  Let's talk about my buddy Woods first.  We've been friends for 41 years.  His mom used to babysit my brother and me after school sometimes after we moved to the US from Italy. Woods and I were in the same grade at the same elementary school but I'd say we didn't really start hanging out a ton until high school.  That's when woods had the faux skater haircut and the faux Ford Mustang.  Then came college, where he, Felix, Kit and I all cut a lot of classes to play video games commuted to school, then after college Woods was my first roommate at Scotchhollow apartments.  I remember many nights listening to Santana and playing Jetmoto on the Playstation.  I introduced Woods to Campari (you're welcome).  I can't remember how many nights I came home from work to see him planted in front of the tv watching the movie "Heat" and staring off into the distance.  I gave Woods and Tiff the worst best man speech ever for which I have apologized both in real life and many, many times in my head.  They still chose me as the godfather to Tabitha for some reason that I'll never understand.   Woods is and has been a great friend that I've been lucky to have.  He's been working full-time since he was 17, so when the opportunity of a sabbatical from his job presented itself he jumped at the opportunity to combine two of his passions:  cycling and travel.  I think he told me it was going to be all across Scandinavia but then, you know, Covid, so it ended up as 4 weeks in Denmark.  As I mentioned earlier I invited myself.  Of course, I wasn't going to do any sort of rigorous cycling on short-notice with no training (I learned that lesson from the trek in Nepal), but a week at the tail end in Copenhagen eating and drinking sounded pretty good to me.

It was strange to say the least to be at an airport and excited to get on a plane after the last couple of years.  Half of the booths and restaurants at the SFO international terminal are closed and everyone is wearing a mask.  Masks are mandatory on the flight as well, which isn't as bad as it sounds except I had a bit of chafing behind my ears after the 10 hour flight.  Every other seat is empty unless you're traveling with other people.  Other than that, it was much the same as always.  When I arrived in Copenhagen it was 8am on a Saturday so the streets were largely empty.  I like walking around a city in the early morning to get a feel for it without the distraction of people.  My first impressions of central Copenhagen were that it smells like the sea, it's very clean and it's very bike/pedestrian friendly.

Woods and I checked into an Airbnb in Nyhavn near the harbor that was owned by an opera singer and had extremely wonky floors.  It gave the appearance that we had somehow surprised the hosts by showing up... there was the aforementioned laundry in the washer and a full load of clean dishes in the dishwasher.  We spent most of day 1 wandering around Copenhagen, having some pastries, taking the water taxi around town, buying snacks at a convenience store, and ending up at Broens street food for dinner.  I introduced Woods to the Negroni (you're welcome again).  I would also advise you to never, ever, ever eat Kim's pork cracklings if you're in Denmark.  Let's just say they didn't sit well.

The first half of day 2 was spent dealing with the aftermath of said pork cracklings, but we did salvage the second half of the day walking around town and taking the ferry to Reffen street food.  This is an outdoor street food park with probably 30-40 stalls plus a few bars.  There was a stage with a band playing Danish retro pop with hooks that wormed their way into my brain and I am still humming two weeks later.  Please please please whatever you do never listen to Blød Indeni by Thøger Dixgaard.  It will haunt your dreams.  Okay, you should listen to it.  I don't want to be alone in my struggle.  Here you go:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-MSCF_Ayrg4

Woods signed us up for a Danish pastry class that ended up being taught by a French guy named Frederic Terrible.  It's okay though... he's been living in Denmark for 30 years and he used a lot of butter.  A lot.  Of.  Butter.  We learned how to make four different kinds of pastries using the same dough as a base, and it was a lot easier process than I imagined.  Happy to share the recipes with you if you're interested.  The downside of taking a class from a French pastry chef is that it's a French pastry chef.  He would come around and look at your twists and say "that's fine" then point out three things that are wrong with it and then say "but that's fine."  You could see the sweat forming on his brow from the internal struggle that was waging within him:  His knowledge that we are beginners and not professionals and he should be patient battling against the fact that we are fucking up his pastries.  Ultimately the former prevailed but it was a near thing.  Consider this a wholehearted endorsement of the class though... I wouldn't want to learn from some jackass who gives us a participation ribbon for cranking out shitty pastries.

Travelers returning to the US need to have a negative Covid test within 3 days of departure so that was our next stop.  There is an extremely well-organized testing station set up in central Copenhagen where they set up a large tent in a square outside a church with a ton of health workers.  We were in and out of there in 10 minutes.  Note:  Woods was *extremely* nervous about the test.  Denmark has completely opened up, as in zero social distancing, masks only on public transport, all restaurants and bars are fully open, etc.  It was great but it definitely played on Woods' anxiety brain.  This is a guy who would need 2-3 hours blocked off to mentally prepare for work when he was stocking the milk box at the grocery store.  Anyhow, nothing to worry about we were both in the clear.  We then took a harbor tour on a boat piloted by Sebastian who showed us the architectural highlights with backstories and emphasized to us that there are two things that are important to the Danes:  Water (as in bodies of water) and enjoying different types of food.

The next day we took the train to Roskilde for perhaps one of the best museums I've ever visited:  The Viking Boat Museum.  I feel that "museum" is a bit of a misnomer given that there are actual woodworkers building actual Viking boats using tools and techniques from 1000 years ago.  It's a living exhibit.  Woods and I roamed around the shipyard and ended up talking to one of the woodworker/docents for 10-15 minutes about the process, techniques, how he got into it, etc.  The Vikings had all sorts of complicated ways of making their boats seaworthy and watertight using horsehair and tar between planks, and when Woods and I expressed amazement at this our new friend reminded us that they had already been building boats for 9000 years by this point.  The boat they were currently working on would take 5 years to build since they are only able to work on it during the summer season.  They have already built five other replica boats, one of which was sailed/rowed from Copenhagen to Dublin and back in 2007-2008.  Our buddy told us that he initially started out studying forestry but got into shipbuilding during his studies.  In Denmark they pay you a salary while you go to vocational school so there was no downside for him to pivot his career.  The whole concept of the museum was founded when they discovered a bunch of Viking boats that had been scuttled in an apparent attempt to block access to the fjord.  They pieced them back together back in the 1960s in order to learn about how they were crafted and built, and they are still on display at the museum.  It wasn't a good day for sailing but Woods and I jumped into one of the Viking boats and were able to spend an hour rowing out into the fjord to experience what it was like to get out on the water.  I was surprised at how little resistance the oars offered in the water but that was by design.  The Vikings wanted folks to be able to row for extended periods and not burn themselves out quickly.  Those guys were out on the water for weeks!

That evening was our fancy dinner at Kokkeriet in Copenhagen.  If you want a synopsis of what that was like, I think you can get a general idea by watching this:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkaL4qHKwzA .  I will admit that fine dining is a long way from my backpacking days, but when you compress 6 months of travel down to one week you end up with a bit more disposable income.  Besides, in all the years we've known each other Woods and I have never traveled together or had a fancy meal.  So he deserved it.  Our waiter was Luca from Croatia and we were lucky enough to be in the restaurant on a Tuesday which is the testing night.  What that means that is in addition to your regular menu they give you four additional plates and ask for your feedback on them.  I will let the math and the pictures do the talking by adding up one amuse-bouche, 9 courses, 4 tasters and 8 wine pairings.  We did not get an early start the next day.  I will close this by saying it was the second-best fine dining experience I've ever had after Vinkeles in Amsterdam.

Our last touristy trip was to Helsingor, also known as Elsinore which is where Hamlet takes place.  Kronborg castle is its name, and it lies along the Danish coast a stone's throw from Sweden.  Visitors have almost complete access to the castle inside and out.  Many of the rooms have been set up and decorated with furniture and art from the appropriate periods, and there are multilingual blurbs that describe each room and its function.  You can visit the chapel and even the casements underground where folks would hide out during a siege.  There are quite a few hat-tips to Hamlet, especially the plays and movies that have been recorded on location.  You can walk all around the grounds including along a short beach where you can set foot in the Baltic sea.

Overall I had a great time hanging out with a great friend in a great country.  I'd highly recommend a trip to Denmark as I think would Woods, and his opinion should count more than mine given that he spent a total of five weeks there.  A few random observations for you:

• At first I thought that tanning salons were a thing in Denmark but after a few days I realized that there are just a lot of tan Danes.  I don't know if they tan easily or spend a lot of time outdoors or both.
• Danes speak such good English.  I don't mean just vocabulary but also slang and colloquialisms.  I never had to stretch myself beyond "hi" and "tak".
• People are fit but not as tall as I thought they would be.  Why did I think they would be tall?  I don't know.
• I never withdrew any cash in my 6 days in Denmark.  I paid for everything with my credit card.
• There are almost no Covid restrictions other than on public transport and at the airport.  Everything seemed back to normal, including the crowds.
• Architecture in Copenhagen is striking.  I'd call it modern without being oppressive or pretentious.
• It is super easy to walk everywhere, and the bike infrastructure is amazing.  There are two separate sidewalks in central Copenhangen:  one for bicycles and a raised one for pedestrians.  Both are well-marked and you will be punished if you make the mistake of walking on the bicycle path.
• There are a surprising number of hornets in Copenhagen.

Welp, at least I got one trip under my belt this year.  I'd like to go somewhere in the latter half as well but we'll see.  These are crazy times.  Hope you're all keeping safe and sane.

Here's a link to the photo album.  Enjoy!  https://photos.app.goo.gl/2y37gMpePmbpz6qa6

Take 'er easy,

Dave